Tuesday 19 January 2010

Starting a Mood Mapping self help group

Fifteen years ago, I preferred to starve than eat in front of people I didn't know. I could not even say my name to a group. Now I volunteer to talk to audiences of 10s, 100s if not 1000s. Over the last ten to fifteen years, I learnt the social skills, I should have learnt as a child. I worked hard to change because "Someone needed to do it". When Soames Michelson became too ill to faciliate groups the Doctors Support Network groups, I had no choice but to step up to the plate.

A self help group believes that together you can help each other more than each of you can do as individuals on your own. In a group, you "Gain by Giving".You too can start a self-help group and here are few tips.

A group needs to be as open and as inclusive as possible. It is like a family. Once you are committed to someone, they are part of your team. Not everyone will not be helped by your group, for example, addicts may be better with Alcoholics Anonymous and you would be wise to point them in that direction. As long as this is done with good intention, and openly and calmly communicated, the group survives.  For the most part, you want to include everyone who wants to come along. Some people learn quicker than others and everyone can help the slow learners. The fastest people are at their best when balanced by slower more thoughtful people!

Keep it Simple! Keep coming back to the reason you are together


Know what you want to do,
Have your first meeting - at your house or in a coffee bar. Email people you know with your idea, start a blog, email people you know. If your idea is good, it will catch and you will soon have people coming to you, and it will spread by word of mouth

Meet at least every month, in my experience every two weeks is best. Weekly meetings can be too intense unless you have plenty of experienced group members.

Stay calm! You cannot argue with distress.

Groups create an energy. You need at least two people in the room who can direct that energy, maturely, intelligently with compassion and reason.This allows one person to help another group member individually when necessary.

Develop "group rituals" - set activities you do each time you meet

Go round the group and let everyone introduce themselves and describe briefly how they are and what has happened to them
Read out loud a chapter from Mood Mapping or other books
Have plenty of refreshments
Be nice to each other!

Communicate, communicate, communicate!


Communicate regularly - keep everyone up to date- monthly newsletters are hard work but help bring people together - just a quick hello and an anonymised summary of recent meetings
Just do what feels right, keep doing it, keep talking, be creative and keep the energy flowing!

We have to learn to fit in within a family, group and community. Some families function better than others, some groups work better than others. If humanity is to solve its problems we need to learn to work together. If we can't communicate we can't learn. Humans are a social species and we do our best work when we work together. Even Einstein needed feeding!
Groups are a great place to learn to connect and communicate with people at any age. Most people learn to communicate as children, but not everyone! I can testify it is never too late to learn, it is just easier before you have too many ingrained bad habits!


and finally, thanks to the commentator on the last post, who suggested this post!

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Copyright (c) Dr. Liz Miller
http://www.lizmiller.info/
www.lizmiller.co.uk
www.moodmapping.com

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